coming soon: August 2003 Score

SCORE: Now, why does Howard Stern love you so much?
MARY: Because I clean his toilet bowl with my hair. Because I'm talkative. Bubbly. And his crew really likes me.
SCORE: Who on Howard's staff tried to do you?
MARY: Isaac, the cameraman from E! And Will. Will's hot, I would totally do him. We always flirt. Gary and Casey, I just give them big hugs. They like to feel my boobs, so I hug them. Isaac says, "Mary, show us your tits," all the time. And you're not allowed to show tits on E!, so I just put my hair over my boobs and said, "Okay, E-Man, now you can show my boobs without having to blur them out." And then I lifted my hair to show my nipples, and they blurred that, too. My fans loved that.
SCORE: How did you get on Howard Stern's show in the first place?
MARY: Well, I always wanted to go on Howard Stern, ever since Jenna Jameson was on the show. Jenna's my role model, and, like Jenna said, it's all about publicity and promotion. And the more publicity you get and the more promotion you do, the more well-known you get and the more money you make. So how I got on Howard Stern was, I had an agent at the time who had the address and had a connection. And I'd made a video of me and my retarded mom, and I said mom needed a date 'cause she hadn't had a date since I was born, all because of my retarded father.

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